I had a nice little break.
It felt good.
But now, it’s back to the daily grind.
The anxiety bouts that started about a year ago are now reaching alarming levels.
I recently wrote a post on Canvas about it: Is this what getting better mean?
Unfortunately, I am facing a few challenges right now. Both life and work related.
The old monster is awake and threatening to break free. My last two therapy sessions were rather painful and I am really not looking forward to the next one.
There are some good news. Like my trip to California in two weeks. My daughter and her boyfriend are going to a wedding in Sacramento and it just so happened that they got hired to be part of a commercial being shot that week in San Francisco. So, as a mother’s day present, she’s bringing me with her! We’re spending the week in San Francisco and the weekend in Sacramento, where I’ll get to go to the famous Sacramento Music Festival.
I am very much looking forward to it. I keep reminding myself of this. I keep telling myself it’s going to be great. San Francisco is in my Bucket List and I still can’t believe I’m going.
But I feel myself losing my footing. Slowly slipping.
The sadness. The pain in my stomach.
The darkness that lurks just around the corner.
The bad dreams.
I haven’t lost hope just yet.
But I am terrified.
‘The darkness that lurks just around the corner’ – I guess that’s just the way it works… There’s always something waiting to happen, and it’s mostly not a very fun thing.
But I hope it doesn’t get you down. I hope you’ll be having a great time, and that you’re able to chase the darkness away…
Thank you. Less than two weeks and I’ll be on my way to Cali. I have to focus on that, right?
You are obviously looking at the brighter side of life (know the Monty Python song?) – keep it above the parapet. We send hugs and a bright light.
LOVE that one. And everything Monty Python too.
Thank you! You certainly made me smile
Hang in there mate!
California should be wonderful for you and I truly hope it is!
Thanks Jared. I think I’m feeling better today. I had a lot of bad dreams last night so I’m a bit shaken.
I can’t wait to go to Cali. 13 more days, says the widget on my blog! :)
((Hugs)) Keep holding on, Claudia. Hopefully the weather up north will be nice when you get there, although San Francisco is notoriously rather damp.
Thanks a ton. I’m feeling better now although I did have another episode earlier today.
I’ve been told San Fran never gets too hot so that’s good. And I really can’t wait. Another of my bucket list items :)
An honest and relatable post. Keep on keeping on. Blessing to you!
Thank you. I’m trying. Some days it’s easier, some days… Not so much
Wishing you lots of brightness coming up.
Thank you. Getting lots of sunshine in California helps a bit.
Maybe I can say this now? Hold on to those who give you safety and comfort – tightly. They won’t let go.
Very wise words, Sid. Very wise words, indeed!
Hope you had fun with Savvy and Linda JEALOUS XXX :-)
He he. I am SO SO happy I got to go visit with them! It was awesome