Bloody Vicious Cycles

Here I am, stuck in another one of those bloody vicious cycles we all know so well:

I’m in pain therefore I don’t exercise ==> I don’t exercise therefore I am in pain.

Throw a funny funk (aka depression) in and it just makes for a lovely recipe for another vicious cycle:

The more depressed I get, the less I am inclined to get out of bed, shower and go out ==> the less I go out, the more I get depressed.

In summary:

Vicious Cycle

Losing this particular battle at the moment, I’m afraid.

And it is not that I necessarily need human contact. I am quite happy on my own. But I do need nature contact. I need to feel the wind in my face, hear the birds sing, smell the grass, take the view in.

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy meeting with friends over coffee and cake. Mmmm cake. I love hearing about what’s going on in their lives. I love laughing with them and even crying with them. And I love coffee and cake. Mmmm cake.

But I enjoy solitude, quietness, stillness. I don’t go insane over not talking to anyone for extended periods of time like some people tell me they do.

Nature, on the other hand, nature I can’t do without. Watching goofy squirrels work and play. Birds fly. The sound of water. The sight of threes. That I can’t can’t do without.

I could certainly do without ze physical pain, though. For sure.

That, however, won’t happen unless I go out and walk. Or exercise otherwise. Which is not happening. Because I am stuck in that bloody vicious cycle right now.

Need to break free somehow.

9 thoughts on “Bloody Vicious Cycles

  1. Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA says:

    I’m really sorry you’re stuck in the doldrums, Claudia. It’s winter (um, I guess you already know that😉) and boy, it’s hard to get outside and move the old carcass when it’s cold and you’re hurting and you have to put on ten layers before you can even open the door….do you have a dog? Without my dog I would never go outside in the winter. I would just lie in bed taking benzos so I could hibernate like the bears….

    • Summer Solstice Girl says:

      So true. I like cold weather though. And I adore snow. When I am not in a funk, there’s nothing I enjoy more than going for a walk in the snow. Especially recently fallen snow. I love that crunchy feeling under my boots. So I skip and hop and jump and it makes me oh so happy. But the pain is a real drain

      • Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA says:

        Pain sucks. It gets in the way of enjoyment. I have a pair of dynamite snowshoes that I used to go running in the woods with, with two very wolfy-looking German Shepherds. It was the bomb. If I tried that now I’d be crippled for life. I sure would love to, though!

    • Summer Solstice Girl says:

      Oh, and I do not have a dog. I. Have two cats and currently four foster kittens. My cat Jay and I did used to go for walks all the time. We enjoyed our walk together. Unfortunately now we live right between in between two of the busiest streets this side of town. Lots of cars, trucks and buses on each side of out block. Not good for a cat :(

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