Tag: ADHD

Holy 🐄

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I just wrote this blurb as a way of introducing myself to a new Facebook group. Which group matters not. 

But Holy Cow, it all sounds so preposterous when put together.

I mean, would you not think it would be impossible for any one individual to be so fucked up? 

So I laughed. Because it is ludicrous. And now I’m sharing it here so you can laugh with me too.

1. I have no filters. No, seriously. I have lost friendships over this. So please let me know if/when I cross the line. Any line. I have a hard time understanding and recognising lines.

 

2. Just a little bit of a background.
Things/illnesses I deal with: 
Chronic pain since age 11. Current diagnosis, fibro. 
Mental illness. PTSD and all that follows. Depression, anxiety, panic attacks, emotional lability, etc.
Progressive neurological deterioration of unknown origin. MS ruled out. No working diagnosis at the moment.
ADHD & Giftedness. Never been diagnosed with Autism, but my educated guess given my medical background is that I am in the spectrum even if highly functional.
POTS. Hypothyroidism. Dysfunctional contraregulatory hormone response. Basically, my whole hypothalamic–pituitary–adrenal axis is broken.
Dysgraphia made worse by a TIA four years ago. Especially aggravating when taking math tests. UGH
Woman of Colour (black and native) who is light enough to almost pass as white. You’d think that would not represent a problem. But it is aggravating that [racist] people treat me nice while they are the way they are to my brothers and sisters. I carry much anger inside. Sometimes I think I’m going to spontaneously combust, so fierce it roars.
3. I have never learned how to be succinct. Don’t know how to be concise.
4. Apparently I don’t know how to count either.

There you have it.

Isn’t it hilarious in its preposterousness? 

PS: posting from phone so formating will be wonky. Sorry you have to deal with it

The Maze

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…  that is my [ADHD] brain.

Or for those closer to my age, the Labyrinth that is my [ADHD] brain, complete with Sting and all.

At any given time, I have a gazillion thoughts going through The Maze, like Gladers on crack being chased by Grievers.

Quite a few of them fight each other too.

It goes something like this:

grumble, grumble, grumble… I hate Life.

ooooooooh the birds are singing, how beautiful!

I hate people. Wish people went extinct

I am so lucky to have this place! I love listening to the birds singing and chattering. And then there’s all the kitties that come to my backyard

Jesus, can I ever catch a break… fucking hell… what a ridiculous soap opera…

I miss my kids

Crap, when’s that counseling appointment again, gorram scumbag brain

And that’s just like a 60 seconds window into my scumbag brain. Continue reading →

Customer Service For Dummies*

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* And by this, I don’t mean in the widely popular Stuff For Dummies Book Series sense but how to do customer service with dummies like me.

In case anyone had any doubts I cannot adult. This is the latest proof of it.

When I moved to Windsor, many scary things happened.

The scariest of all was that utilities were not included in the rent anymore.

All of a sudden, I had to take care of an electricity bill, a phone bill and an internet bill. Plus rent. Plus now I own a credit card. That’s five  freaking payments I have to make every month. FIVE. Of course, it was only a matter of time until I was going to fuck it up.

I tried to make things easier for myself and get everything to be automatically deducted from my bank account or my shiny brand new credit card.

No dice.

The most I could do for rent is an electronic payment via email. But that is still a win in book. At least I don’t have to write a stupid cheque every month.

If there is a way to sign up for automatic payments for the electricity bill, haven’t figured it out yet.

I was, however, able to set up automatic payments via credit card for my phone bill.

I thought I had done the same for my internet bill.

Why can’t my phone carrier and my internet carrier be one and the same?

Yes, yes. I know the big carriers provide that. Thank you, but no thank you. By switching to a small carrier, I chopped my phone bill to exactly half, while going from 1GB of data/ month to unlimited data every month. So I am sticking with them

Right. Payments. I managed to do O.K. for the months of January, February and March.

Come April and all hell brakes lose. On April 3rd, I realized I had still not payed rent. UGH. I rushed to my phone to make the electronic payment. I am supposed to get late fee charges starting the 2nd, I think. Late, schlate. In the big scheme of things, not a biggie, right? Right.

Wait, it gets better.

While on my way to Lansing, I got a bunch of text messages and emails from Wind letting me know I was late with my phone bill.

Say whaaaaaat? Continue reading →

[ADHD] Quote of the Day

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Good morning.

I’m back home.  Having coffee and making the rounds and I found this, which I want to share with you!

My message is simple. There are millions of people living with neurological conditions that are simply existing; trying to fit in with a world and population where most won’t, or can’t bend their idea of normal; and at the same time, assume that normal is something everyone aspires to be. Living as someone other than your true self is my idea of torture, and that’s what most people want from us so they can feel comfortable.

I wanted to be the voice that said, “You’re damn right we aren’t normal! We’re AMAZING! We’re WACKY! We’re GENIUSES! We’re bearing millions of gifts for the world to enjoy and you can’t see that –all you seem to notice is how often we lose our keys!” To be fair, it is pretty ridiculous how often we lose our keys…and phone, and wallets, and cars, and children, but still…geniuses

==>  To be fair, it is pretty ridiculous how often we lose our keys…and phone, and wallets, and cars, and children, but still… <==

 

Yeah, that.