3rd North 

It is sad day when you have to go to the hospital in order to feel safe.

Always the geek, I can’t help but notice geometric patterns. Or any pattern, for that matter. That’s the floor at the ER, by the way.

Yep, back in the mental unit.

Such an irony.

They bully stays out while the bullied is the one being committed

*3rd North is where the Mental Health Unit is located at the hospital in Windsor. Funny, in Ottawa, it was the 4th North. Yeah, I know it has nothing to do with anything but my brain is always noticing patterns.

A somewhat big scare

About two weeks ago, I gave my FB friends (and my close ones) a big scare.

First thing I remember from that night? Seeing the paramedics in my room and wondering what the hell was going on.

Last thing I remember before seeing the paramedics, was taking my medication and going to bed.

I am confused, disoriented, scared and my head is about to explode.

Next thing I know, I am in an ambulance, being taken to the hospital.

I try to explain what I know. That my head hurts, that I have a big bump on the back of my head and that it feels squishy. That I don’t remember anything. That I am very confused.

Talk, talk, talk. Waiting. Dunno how much time passed but I am in a hospital bed. Then I am taken to radiology for a CT scan.

Get an IV line. More waiting. But at least I am given pain medication.

IV line

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Follow up and Day Hospital

I’m upset so might I well blog about it, right?

Besides, I suppose I owe you all an update on my mental health.

I am home now. This is how it happened:

First, I got off ward privileges. It meant I could go for walks up to an hour a day, as long as I remained on the hospital grounds. That meant I could get a reasonably good coffee from Second Cup and enjoy the lovely Fall weather.

Then I got a day pass, which I spent with my daughter. I came home, play with the kitties, shaved my legs and my armpits, fell human again, and went for a lovely walk along the canal.

Last, I got a weekend pass. That meant going home on Friday at 2 pm and coming back to the hospital on Sunday at 9 pm. Then I’d be evaluated on Monday morning and it everything went well, go home.

Well, everything did go well, and I came home on October the 7th – now and outpatient, with a bunch of medication and an appointment for the Day Hospital program at the Civic Campus for October 16. Yes, that’s today. I’ll get to it in a bit.

Incidentally, during that weekend, my daughter and I finally went to see Star Wars Identities, the Star War exhibit at the Aviation & Space Museum. It was out of this world (pun intended). I highly recommend it if it ever goes to your town and if you are a Star Wars fans and a geek like me.

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Damn You Stigma

In case you are out of the loop, I am currently at the hospital. Been here for almost two weeks now

But not just any hospital.

I’m at the 4 North Mental Health Unit of The Ottawa Hospital, General Campus.

Yes, that’s right. I am in a physch ward.

Now, there was a time when I would rather have died than let people know I had a mental illness. THAT’S THE STIGMA.

I would have not voluntarily gone to a hospital to admit myself . THAT’S THE STIGMA.

If hospitalized, I would have lied about the cause of my hospitalization. THAT’S THE STIGMA.

Well, I know better now. I know there is no shame in having a mental illness. I know that admitting my mental illness(es) sometimes get out of control is a brave thing. I know that reaching out for support when I need it, is not only good great but that is actually the RIGHT thing to do.

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