How to properly​ insult a person according to their gender

I’ve been meaning to write this post for at least four years, if not more.

Of course, there is always something else that requires my attention… Blah, blah blah (insert image of Dracula here). Plus I’ve had nothing but problems and bad luck when it comes to Internet access since I moved to Windsor, which doesn’t help at all.

But! Today’s the day, I guess.

The subject is both a musing and a pet peeve of mine. HUGE (yes, all caps, bold and italics. It is that bad) pet peeve: the use of women-pertaining words as insults.

Early on in my journey of unlearning all the sexist crap imbued in me by the patriarchal society I grew in, I realized that most insult words in all the languages I know (can’t speak for the ones I don’t know) have to do with woman related stuff.

How do you insult a woman? You call her a whore, a bitch, a slut.

How do you insult a man? Do you call him a man-whore, a dog or slut too? Of course not. You use a female body part -pussy, cunt, twat (the outstanding exception being dick or any dick-related word). But if you really want to drive the point, then you call him a son of a bitch. A motherfucker. Never a fatherfucker, no. Oh no. The worse thing you can call a man in English is a motherfucker (the absolute worst thing you can call a man in Spanish is hijo de puta which means son of a whore). Have you ever stop to think why this is?

Let’s go back to the first kind of insults for a moment. Twat. Cunt. Douchebag (I particularly bloody despise this one). For millennia, women have been told their vaginas are dirty, smelly, disgusting. In the last century they were even told they should wash their vaginas to try and keep them reasonably clean. So they invented those douche contraptions (douche meaning something of a shower), composed of a bag to hold the rinsing solution and a dildo-looking hand shower that is to be inserted in the vagina in a order to wash it, connected to the bag by a small hose. That is what people use as an insult. Incidentally, it find it ironic that people -in their ignorance- use the bag part as the insult proper and not the dildo-looking part. Hilarious. Only that it is not.

Now, I ask: Why would anyone in their right minds use a female body part (or a device used for -arguably- feminine hygiene) to insult someone else? 

I’ll tell you why. Because we women are though lowly, unclean, debased, unworthy. Especially those parts of us involved in reproduction. Or *gasp* sexuality/pleasure. Thus it follows that the best way to insult anyone is to compare them to a filthy woman’s part. Capisce?

Furthermore, a woman who dares to enjoy her sexuality is a whore, a slut. Something undesirable. So much, it can be successfully used as an insult. It is bad enough for a woman to be called a whore* . But when you tell a man his mother is one… oh, boy; all hell breaks loose. Do not dare question the purity of his mother. If men could, they would all be borne by a virgin.

Think about it. Sleep on it. 

And most importantly please, I beg of you, stop using swear/insult words that perpetuate patriarchal cultures.

Footnotes

* Bitch being initially the same thing, as bitches -females dogs- were the ultimate representation of a female that sleeps around. That however has somewhat changed and nowadays bitch is understood more as a bossy, unreasonable or downright malevolent woman; although “Son of a bitch” persists as an insult for a man.

An Open Letter To Ms. Leslie Jones

Dear Ms Jones,

You don’t know me. I’m just one of the countless nameless geeks and nerds of the world. I am also a woman. I am not white and I have no money.

That renders me pretty much voiceless in a world where only white males are heard; are listened to.

However I would like to write something, in the odd chance it ends up reaching you.

I was a teenager when the first Ghostbusters came out. I -like a million others- loved it. It became somewhat of a cult for me. Continue reading

An Open Letter to Scrapbook.com

Dear Scrapbook.com¹,

I absolutely love you guys. Ever since I discovered you about two years ago, I just can’t get enough of your store. If money were not an object, I am pretty sure I’d buy every single thing you sell. So much fun!

However, today I’d like to talk to you about something that is been nagging at me since I got reacquainted with the arts & crafts two or three years ago; the blatant sexism in the papercrafting/scrapbooking community.

Items that are or have some blue in them are tagged as “boy”. Items that are pink or have some pink in them are tagged as “girl”. Any item that is even remotely associated with science is tagged as “boy”. AS BOY!!!!! Continue reading

The One Where I Muse About Sexism And Paradigms

As usual, Facebook is a never-ending source of grief.

The stupid things that people post all the time are… well… stupid.

To me, that is. Because as a wise friend of mine and fellow canvas author pointed out the other day, who gets to say what’s stupid?

But as usual, Facebook, for all its stupidity it always makes me think. And that is a good thing. And man, it has plenty of cats. So that’s why I stay. Because Cats, dude!

This time around, there is a petition regarding the Canadian Swing Championships. And that is a BIG deal for us, swing dancers. It deals with sexism, misogyny, rape culture (don’t worry, no one was sexually assaulted) comments during the event. A blow up doll was involved too. Very tasteless

Bad stuff.

And also as usual, you have the prevailing two poles (why are we human beings like that?): One faction is throwing up their’s hands in horror while another is like, grow some thick skin. If you don’t like the event just don’t attend. It is all in good fun.

Worse of all (although I predicted it last night when link for the petition was sent to me in a private message), it became a witch hunt.

The truth, as it is usually the case, is somewhere in the middle and there are a lot of grey areas there. Continue reading

The Gender Roles Vs. Toys Issue

Or

My Issues With Gender Roles & Toys

Or

Why The [expletive here] Is This Still Happening?

I know I’m preaching to the choir here.  I know we have discussed this many times before.

But!

I went to Mrs. Tiggy Winkles today, looking for a Christmas gift for my nephew.

I want something like a Jr. Scientist kit or something along those lines and that place is really good for it.  In fact, I looked for the gift at the Air & Space and the Natural History museums when I was in DC.  They did have some great ones but the problem was all the instructions were in English.  You see, my nephew lives in Colombia and doesn’t speak any English.  I thought it was weird that in a city were most signs are both in English and Spanish, I couldn’t find a geeky gift set with Spanish instructions.

The good news, Mrs. Tiggy Winkles has a ton of those “little Scientist” kits made in Europe.  All of them come with instructions in English, French, German, Spanish, Italian and Danish.  Score!

I think I’m gonna get him these two.  He’s a very curious kid and he likes to learn how things work and he’s very environmentally conscious so I think he will be happy with them.

But that’s not why I got annoyed. Continue reading